Parenting & Family Life

Teen Dating

A lot of adults and parents become incredibly strict when they begin to catch a drift of defiance in teens. Many parents and guardians are totally baffled with how to handle an out of control teenager. While it’s true that most parents don’t want their child to become an out of control teen, this is exactly what can happen if you are too strict on them. In fact, you may already have a teen in your home that you feel is out-of-control. Below you will find three unconventional tips on how to handle an out of control teenager.

1. Tolerance: The last thing any parent or person in authority wants to do is tolerate the out-of-control behavior. However, some teens react much better, and even stop the undesirable behavior, when adults show a little tolerance. I’m not suggesting you just let your teen do whatever she wants, but I’m suggesting that you don’t blow up over every little thing. When it comes to learning how to handle an out of control teenager, it is imporant to daw a line between what is out of control behavior and what behaviors are not out of control.

You really need to consider your situation before you try implementing this tip. Take a look at the teen and try to look at things from her point of view. You may find that your teen is just trying to exercise a little independence. If this is the case, then find areas where you can show tolerance for your teen. For example, if your teen is in band and you require that she practices 30 minutes every day and you want it done right when she gets home, but she fights with you every day about it, and possibly leaves the house as a result, consider letting her make the decision when to practice…as long as it gets done before she goes to bed.

2. Ignore It: Many teens do things just to irritate their parents. In most cases, we’re talking about leaving laundry on the floor or speaking a particular way, but with out-of-control teens we’re usually talking about things like staying out past curfew or leaving the house without telling you where he’s going. If the behavior doesn’t involve anything that is either emotionally or physically harmful such as drugs or alcohol – then try ignoring it.

Sometimes when teens realize they aren’t going to get the reaction they are looking for from you any longer, they will stop the behavior altogether. Part of learning how to handle an out of control teenager is simply trying discern whether your teen is just trying to “push your buttons” or not. If so, try ignoring it and see what happens, you might be surprised!

3. Listen: One of the big mistakes parents of teenagers make is not listening. Many parents see things their teens are doing that they don’t agree with and they begin to lecture them about it…over and over again. This can contribute to your teen becoming an out-of-control teen. Therefore, try listening to your teenager.

Teens want to be viewed as adults and often times they act out, become disruptive and even out-of-control when they don’t feel this way. When you take the time to listen to your teen regarding their views, opinions and reasoning before you lecture, you may find your teen starts “coming around.” It’s okay to disagree with your teen – especially if they’re wrong, but at least ask for their reasoning and then, in a calm and non-judgmental way, explain why you feel the way you do.